Sex Addict Sven

A tune for the day first
Fiction plane-two sisters
So Lee Glover is the assistant that we have been courting for several weeks to help KW.
His record as a manager on his own although he was player manager at both clubs is poor to say the least. Granted he was on minuscule budgets but it was still poor.Guess we will just have to see how it all pans out.Looks like a case of good cop,bad cop from a distance!
Michael Owen has today urged the England fans to get behind the national side and not boo them. To be honest Michael the Real England fans don't give a monkeys about the Fa's over hyped lets try and show how wonderful the overrated, obscenely priced new Wembley is, Brazil friendly. You Will have no problem there .If the players fail to turn up against Estonia though the fans have every right to boo and try and get rid of the heap of clueless poo that is Steve McClaren.
I'd have a little wager Mr Owen has been feeling the love and positive thinking from our forum.
I saw sex addict Sven on the TV at the weekend with Gabby Logan and he did admit that the off the pitch shagging anything that moved was a distraction to the job.What annoyed me was he tried to defend the fact that he could have open negotiations with other prospective employers to safeguard his future even after just signing a massively paying new three year contract to manage England!!An amazing case of disrespect to a whole nation. Mind you he was discussing jobs with Peter ( i will support whoever pays me the most) Kenyon who gives a toss for no-one but himself.

Some Two Pints Clips

Very Very Funny clips from a series that is still excellent and on top of that Ralph Little is a very good footballer

An Odd day

To start with a musical interlude for you perusal
The Go! Team-grips like a vice

What an odd day it has been , lots of weird stuff overnight and continuing on all morning. Finishing with a phone call telling me that i have become a Uncle again but this time on my side of the family with my little sister having a baby girl at 9.30 this morning. Good times and especially sweet considering she was told twenty years ago at 17 that she could never have children.For the first time in a long time a real smile has crossed my face today.
Well less of the self indulgent stuff and back to the cynical stuff.
Ryan Giggs announces his international retirement! So bloody what! if he had made the right choice of England in the first place i might of given a toss!
Back to Evans " he says he can now be trusted" Ha! ha! bloody ha! , still looks like the Creepy fans don't want him!
A question,When are team orders not team orders? When they are made by Ron Dennis and Mclaren of course.The rules only apply to minnows of any sport you must know that!

NO One Wants Him

Another day, similar weather and a new post.
So Evans has left Lincolnshire and has now been appointed manager at Creepy. Good luck to them and they are definitely going to need it with a club owned by a crook now appointing a crook to manage the team.I see this has gone down like a lead balloon with Creepy fans with this already on the forum header for those that don't want to click through

Closer to home I see Woodbridge are trying to hold the club to ransom over Joe Francis. "we want the player to progress but want a fair fee they cried" well take the fair fee you Muppet's and let the player progress then.I have to admit I like the look of the friendlies so far, there are some good early tests there for players to find a rhythm of play and sharpen some match fitness.
If you missed the International Football Factories last night , it is a must watch. Dyer did Argentina last night and it has to be seen to be believed , it really is jaw dropping stuff.
And I caught up Justin lee Collins does Dallas as well yesterday , absolutely hilarious if it's repeated make sure you catch up with it.
On a social level did you know and this only came out from watching "Power To The People" yesterday that the old folks that "LIVE" in care homes are not covered under the Human Rights act unlike those that are in prison! This is Outrageous and should be changed and another great bit of tv with the programme for a change.
Here's The Zimmers for your entertainment

Robbie Williams

So who is going to be the bookies favourite to be relegated from the premiership next year, all will be revealed by 6pm at the latest today .They say that the prize promotion brings is about 50 million in extra revenue,it must be about time the premiership shared more of this money that they generate back down to grassroots football at all levels
Who dare bet that a majority of this money is spent on players no better than the ones that have just got the club promoted and also that 80% of the new players are imported.Give the kids a chance to ply their trade and save some money.The adage that you can't win nothing with the kids was disproved many seasons ago.
I really don't care who goes up, neither team enters onto my radar for any reason and they will only end up as cannon fodder for a majority of the sides that are firmly entrenched in the top two leagues out of three that exist within the in the premiership.
Lets hope for a goal drenched game on the ploughed field that will be Wembley by the end of the game.I hear from someone that has recently visited the place that the rivers of piss that used to appear within the concourses at each game at the old Wembley have reappeared again with new toilets already not working properly,some old traditions just never go away!
Changing the subject, this bloody rain meant that i caught up with The Real Football Factories International presented by Danny Dyer yesterday. I enjoyed the old series and this new series looks like it isn't going to disappoint. The first episode took a look at the firms and their culture in Turkey football , shocking is the only word to sum it up.The next episode is on tonight at 10pm on bravo but is repeated during the week, its well worth a watch.I also watched the "Nuts Football Awards" - very amusing and i loved the pink handbags they gave out to the Arse for the best use of "handbags" during the season (I guess the crap beer sponsored cup swung it for them).
Well done to Blackpool yesterday, a well deserved victory and it earned the biggest sigh of the day when Robbie Williams scored and the commentator who must of practised this saying all day came out with " now let that entertain you".Thank goodness Michael Jackson didn't score the first goal. & no he didn't dangle the cup over the barrier.

A post to to cheer us up on a wet bank holiday.

If just for the bottom picture

thanks to Kontraband.com-note- nsfw

Bloody Rain

What a miserable day outside and spiderman is still trapped as well ! C'mon break free!
Well the past week has been full of incident with Jordan Spinks winning American Idol ,the first pictures of the Big Brother house and This just imagine if you did anything like this in a football ground, would it be a suspended sentence then!
Well Nuremberg won the German cup after Stuttgart had spent the whole week on the lash celebrating winning the league and cancelling training sessions, I have to admit i didn't look at the betting odds for the match but guess they would of been favourable.
Also well done Cockney Rebel in the Irish Guineas,I did have a look at these odds.
I see Reo-coker at the "mighty" Hammers has put in a transfer request. don't tell me he's going to move the the Tottenham Massive !! & also that the Arse have signed a new keeper to replace "the whole world is against me angry clown" that is Lehmann.
It seems that the worst West indies side i have ever seen is going to get away with another draw thanks to the good English spring,summer doesn't start until June 1st according to the MET office.The English side is still as bad as it has been in the last 12 months but no doubt the press will build then up to be superstars again!
Onto today's play off final. It's got to be Yeovil simply for the fairytale and also to illustrate how big Kings Lynn fc can become if we ever get it right.According to the EDP yesterday we are looking in the right direction still chasing another striker in Joe Francis and having a chat with Ben Chapman - who a few seasons ago looked pure quality.

An interesting take on a classic painting

The busy with the things you do on saturday's in the close season post

Going to basically stick to comedy today in picture and animation form today.
Just a couple of bits of comment,firstly Gareth Bale saying he is going to a massive club !! The only Tottenham massive is the gang than drive chaved up cars and think they run the area !
Get ready,Get set and Go underachieve again Tottenham.You are the Man City of London town.
Secondly the play off final today. Rovers or the Shrews? No real preference although it would be funnier to see the saddest team in Yorkshire Leeds (spit!) travelling to Shrewsbury on a cold wet winters evening if the place isn't flooded. Go On Revie's son get that bid in and get rid of Bates and lets see him back at Chelski.

A Very Amusing Advert



And spiderman is a bit "Colonel Abrahams" for those that listened to poor pop music in the 80'S


Big cheers to the creators of the above found published on the www

Well Listened

Just a very brief post to accompany the youtube clips today.
Well Listened the board on the family pricing policies that have come out in the last 24 hours.A bold move forward to capture the young supporters that are the life of the club in the future.We captured a few with the big cup matches and now with the price structure in place we may get them back and hold on to them.
Can we just put them in a pen at the bottom of the ground though please so the usual complaints of fruity language don't arise and also to save my ears from the shrill tones that they emit when singing !!
I was surprised there was not a separate pricing concession to get more ladies at the football though or are there closet NOGAF supporters at higher levels ?

Very Funny Goal Celebration

Pretty Impressive goal

John Turner

"John Turner" will he be the one to finally end our days of southern league football? Bit of a Pedestal to put him on but we have to have belief in our new signings.
As he's only 21 and left Cambridge before he was even 20 his stats look pretty good.A goal every 4 games when he started in an always struggling Cambridge side as a teenager get the nod of approval.A England schoolboy international so should have a bit about him although Mr Hammond did this as well !! Love you really Danny!

Not the tallest at 5-10 but looks to have a bit of metal about him purely judging by the picture.
So with Danny Bloomfield already signed and hopefully fit and making sure we hold on to Matty Nolan , plus Heath Preston and Jack D we should look quite formidable as long as they gel together.As for Frew lets not worry to much if he feels that he is to good for us!
I see that Histon are still adding to their squad with a signing from Exeter and that Peterboro (spit!spit!spit!) have signed another defender this time one that looks like he may have broke the bank wages wise,the lad Charlie Lee from Sad Ole Spurs reserves. What odds will you give me that Adam Smith will be on his way out of the club on loan and back with us. Fine by me as long as Boro pick up most of his wages!
Also noted that Gary Mills at Tam.... (sorry just can't bring myself to write it in full) is going only for players that have bus passes for his new promotion challenge,Tony Thorpe and Carl Heggs !!!
Nice interview in the EDP today Mr Chairman.You came across as a very very nice man and I like the weakness.It's something i tend to suffer badly from as well especially with Adnams beer as well. , There's nothing like a good pint of Broadside and i do believe i am starting to warm to you again.

The Climax

So the climax of the season finally arrives,though for most of us the season is long gone and the constant trawling of newspapers, teletext and the internet for snippets of information about our chosen clubs is already well underway.
On to Athens and "The finish in the top four of your league" final. So do you plump for the fact that you have to support the English club because you are English or go for the fact that you have a unhealthy dislike of the Scousers and the fact that if they fluke it and win it "humble" will not be part of a Liverpool follower's vocabulary.
I have been debating this in my mind for the all of the last ten minutes ( C'mon it's that important ! ) and just can't make a decision.
Lets go for a cliche and let football be the winner (as long as AC Milan win) and hope that it's not as dull as the FA Cup final.
Tickets? What is it with ticket allocations to these big games , Both of the allocations for the "TFITTF" cup and the FA cup final have been an absolute disgrace and need addressing by what suit is in charge.
The best bit of tonights final will probably be the flags.None of this "hello mum" stuff for those those witty scousers, the department stores in liverpool will empty of sheets and the dictionary will have been scoured for words that rhyme.
For my shame i will admit that my favourite flag is that one from the seventies about "Joey Jones munching frog legs"

Tuesday's lazy post

It's been a lazy enjoy the sunshine,do all of the outdoor jobs sort of day.So it's simple non-football stuff today

DO you recognise this Man?

& A JOKE

A first-grade teacher was having trouble with one of her students.

The teacher asked, "Eddy what is your problem?" Eddy answered, "I'm too smart for the first-grade. My sister is in the third -grade and I'm smarter than she is! I think I should be in the third-grade too!"

The teacher had had enough.

She took Eddy to the principal's office.

While Eddy waited in the outer office, the teacher explained to the principal what the situation was.

The principal told the teacher he would give the boy a test and if he failed to answer any of his questions he was to go back to the first-grade and behave.

The teacher agreed.

Eddy was brought in and the conditions were explained to him and he agreed to take the test.

Principal: "What is 3 x 3?"
Eddy: "9".

Principal: "What is 6 x 6?"
Eddy: "36".

And so it went with every question the principal thought a third-grade should know.

The principal looks at the teacher and tells her, "I think Eddy can go to the third-grade."

The teacher says to the principal, "Let me ask him some questions?"

The principal and Eddy both agree.

The teacher asks, "What does a cow have four of that I have only two of?"
Eddy, after a moment, "Legs."

Teacher: "What is in your pants that you have but I do not have?"

The principal wondered, why does she ask such a question!

Eddy replied, "Pockets."

Teacher: "What does a dog do that a man steps into?"
Eddy: "Pants"

Teacher: What's starts with a C and ends with a T, is hairy, oval, delicious and contains thin whitish liquid?
Eddy: Coconut

The principal's eyes open really wide and before he could stop the answer,

Eddy was taking charge.

Teacher: What goes in hard and pink then comes out soft and sticky?
Eddy: Bubblegum

Teacher: What does a man do standing up, a woman do sitting down and a dog do on three legs?

The principal's eyes open really wide and before he could stop the answer.

Eddy: Shake hands

Teacher: Now I will ask some "Who am I" sort of questions, okay?
Eddy: Yep.

Teacher: You stick your poles inside me. You tie me down to get me up. I get wet before you do.
Eddy: Tent

Teacher: A finger goes in me. You fiddle with me when you're bored. The best man always has me first.

Principal was looking restless and bit tense.

Eddy: Wedding Ring

Teacher: I come in many sizes. When I'm not well, I drip. When you blow me, you feel good.
Eddy: Nose

Teacher: I have a stiff shaft. My tip penetrates. I come with a quiver.
Eddy: Arrow

Teacher: What word starts with an 'F' and ends in 'K' that means a lot of excitement?
Eddy: Firetruck

The principal breathed a sigh of relief and told the teacher, "Put Eddy in the fifth-grade, I missed the last ten questions myself."

So that's what i based my old look on!

Attendances

After watching Shrek 3 on DVD this morning(Don't ask)I found myself having a stat attack moment and yes i did say stat not snack!
I see that our league attendances were down by just over 3% which only equates to 567 fans in total so not really a problem considering the gate price increase and the lack of consistent family discounts. I don't personally have a problem with the gate increase but the family pricing issue does need resolving properly before the start of the new season.
Some other clubs have not had it so good over at Nene park ex-rich club Irthlingborough Town saw attendances fall by a massive 35%. This equates at over 1100 less fans per game.Ouch! that has got to hurt an already heavily cash strapped club plus they have employed Garry Hill to complete the financial misery.
I also see over at the McCain(other chips are available) stadium at Scarborough they also suffered a fall in attendances by the sum of 43%.An average of nearly 700 fans per game forgoing the game to attend the local fair.I bet the Chelski FA game is a dim and distant memory now for the 912 hardy souls that attended each game.
Interesting and fun i am sure you all agree and one consolation of it all is we still finished higher than Histon in this league!
Thanks to Richard and www.thelinnets.co.uk for the stats.

Memories of Eric

The Conference play off final evokes memories of both sides involved.
The visit of Exeter to the walks involved a whole Saturday spent in the Fenman as the rain ensured that the Walks looked much like the swimming pool that used to actually be on the walks for those old enough to remember it. I used to get dragged kicking and screaming for an early morning swim on a Sunday morning, How cold was that water! It was an absolute blessing that they closed it and the Hudson in Wizzbeck became a much more enjoyable experience. Back to the Exeter visit,the rearranged game was an anti climax with the walks full of those once every couple of years supporters and although we played well first half ,the class of a side that had only just fell into the conference told in the end.The most fun part of playing them was the arranging of how to get to Exeter for a potential replay.It involved helicopters,private flights,trains,and every other combination of travel involved.Never booked any coaches though!
The day out to Morecambe! Most of it is now buried in the King's Lynn travelling fans official secrets vault but it involved a 6am departure from the walks , a very early arrival in the seaside town that they forgot to close down and lots of antics in between and after.Of course we had pictures taken with the statue of comedy godlike genius that as a kid we hated because we were forced to watch him every Christmas day on TV "Eric Morecambe"
Is it just me or does anyone still have issues about Angela Rippon?
The journey home is now legendary and did involve a rugby team in a pub and meeting a landlord that was a native of King's Lynn in a pub just off the M62 somewhere - very random!It's a shame at least one of our number allegedly got on the wrong minibus for the journey home and missed out on this all.
A the burning question , who do want to win? It's got to be Morecambe manged by the legend that is Sammy Mcilroy to start with and after the shameful way that one of our adopted supporters from Salisbury got treated at Exeter last year they deserve to languish in the conference for many a year.

NO!!!!

First Divison Play-offs

Thanks to Forest and Yeovil for a cracking game of football last night,absolute top notch entertainment,I am not an advocate of the play offs at all but the counter argument for them was certainly there for all to see.
Congratulations to Yeovil for making the final. How good must it feel to be a supporter of them, from the conference to the brink of the championship in only 5 years and this from a town with a smaller population than King's Lynn and similar travel network problems.
At least Forest have the consolation that they can get the open top steam paddler out of dry dock and travel up the Trent to play against Lincolnshire's finest Scunthorpe.
On the subject of Scunthorpe,they must have a candidate for manager of the year in Nigel Adkins.Promoted from physio to caretaker manager at the beginning of December and he takes his team on to absolute romp the second division.Well done that man!
Oldham or Blackpool is the next question. I don't really care to be truthful ,playing against Oldham in the fa cup makes no difference in my eyes and if i had to come off the fence it would have to be Blackpool simply on merit as they finished 3rd by a wide margin.
Guess i lost the bet that Moanrinho's dog would present the trophy as a news story on the radio - yes it made it as a main news story! informed me the dog is now back in Portugal.Well that's less for the collection box at church in the morning.
Finally enjoy a beer while watching the FA Cup final

Vitriol

I have been accused of this in its bitterest form so i thought i would share my secret.

Vitriol

Friday Mutterings

As the over hyped we are back at Wembley fa cup final looms I noticed something completely different. Paul Bastock has left St Albans and gone to Irthlingborough Town .
Just the sheer mention of his name sent me off daydreaming of that moment when he was sent scrambling backwards as Robbo lobbed him from the half way line. What a moment , one that will never leave the top 5 blurry eyed moments of my King's Lynn history. Another note to that day out was a journey home with a miracle never ending box of colonel sanders finest chicken.
I also see to day that the cheats from over the bridge have had it confirmed that the 10 point deduction is for the season just finished and they will start with nil points next season if they see it in,this is simply outrageous.It has also been pointed out that they are now more than 3 million in debt , players and staff have not been paid for months and that if the players are listed as a debt then they will be lucky to see 47p in the £1 from the CVA. If i was a player stuff the loyalty , get your wages listed as a debt and get out of that town as quickly as possible , one or two may even cut the mustard at king's Lynn!
What odds do you think i will get that the trophy at wembley will be presented by Jose Arrogantmoano's pet dog who found the trophy hidden in a rosebush in St Tropez put there by the invisible man?

Sam Mcmahon my lord !

So the sometimes god like genius that was Sam Mcmahon has moved onto new treatment rooms.
No real surprise when he only occasionally played , OK he did play in half the games last season but was only fit for a handful. His influence on the games he played was outstanding but can we afford to carry a player that will only play a bit part of our season.
He cost us a large weekly payment for little return so it is no surprise that he was invited to pre-season training and nothing else and at the same time it can't be to any ones surprise that he has left the club because of this, There's Nowt like an ex-league players ego!
So just why are the manger and board surprised that he has left the club?
Do they all live in sheltered accommodation with only free view channels for entertainment?
Get in the real world , one that doesn't involve blaming fans on your own shortcomings.
And back to the whoring comment a few posts earlier. Getting an individual in who doesn't give a toss for anything apart from himself who states openly he will walk from the club if we don't get promotion next season is the equivalent to prostitution.

Oh by way , Good luck to the physios at Sam's new club and Sam of course

Looking at next season already

So it's the good ole southern league for us again. Fan flippin tastic stuck in the league of doom .
and a quick look means we still have 8 visits to the west country inc Merthyr in this stat.
One to the village side of Bashley and for those that have not been there it is a village side, very friendly bunch though and my personal visits have been full of a loss of memory so to speak.
Three new clubs for me to visit in the shape of Brackley (there is a great chippie in this town). Swindon sub.... whatever ..., a few memories of swindon for some here ... i wonder if she is more expensive now?
& Weston "kiss me quick hats" is it really so super mare. lets hope that the seaside visit is before it shuts down for the winter.
Back to Corby, nothing good to say about this so i will pass it over quickly & then back to the most miserable town i have had the mispleasure to experience in recent years Bromsgrove ... What an asshole of a place with the rudest knobheads i have met in many a year. They are even worse than some of us!

C'mon lets bring on another year of false hope with a few adventures.

the new league

Premier Division

Banbury United
Bashley
Bedford Town
Brackley Town
Bromsgrove Rovers
Cheshunt
Chippenham Town
Clevedon Town
Corby Town
Gloucester City
Halesowen Town
Hemel Hempstead Town
Hitchin Town
Kings Lynn
Mangotsfield United
Merthyr Tydfil
Rugby Town
Swindon Supermarine
Team Bath
Tiverton Town
Weston-Super-Mare
Yate Town

Salisbury fc part2

Well done , a very scrappy game but they edged it in the end.
Good to see this on sentana sports as well even if they did have paul parker as a guest
Also saw at least one of the salisbury 3 on the pitch after the game
Good luck in the conference guys.

Salisbury fc

Good luck to them in today's play off final at Stevenage.
Quite a meteoric rise for the club and it is amazing for the infamous Salisbury 3 that travelled
to Kings Lynn on several occasions.
It also shows our club for what it is , we are the "Man City of the southern league"without any shadow of a doubt.
Left behind to wallow while other so called smaller clubs go from strength to strength.
Will next season be any different ?
Guess the jury is out on that one at the minute , all i do know that trying to pass the blame of failure on to supporters is out of order, as is saying that an innocuous Internet forum also led to us failing.
The blame lays firmly at the feet of the playing staff, management and the board of directors and they should accept this instead of conducting meetings that are nothing but
intimidation,bullying and the airing of personal vendettas
The club is also whoring itself but that story is for a later day.

Seizing Control

So they are seizing control from joe public and closing the forum.
WHY ? Screams the poster as the man falls to the ground after being shot. Why?
A Kneejerk reaction to a problem that exists only in their paranoid minds.The forum is moderated and contains no bad language.
Yes it contains opinions and if they become a little too personal then let's get that post deleted , but no-one should be immune to criticism.
Let the playground fight begin.